Meeting Ourselves Where We Are

Heatherash Amara says in “Warrior Goddess Training” that we commit to who we think we should be, rather than committing to meeting ourselves where we are. That is absolutely true in my case. As I have explained, a lot of my suffering has stemmed from my attachment to my desires and expectations; who I want myself and others to be, and finding myself often terribly disappointed. I know I’m not alone in this.

On one particularly tough day several months ago, all I wanted was a long hot soak in the tub. That’s what women do after a long, hard day, right? It sounded so relaxing. I imagined myself in my pristine tub, soaking in bubbles up to my neck, breathing in the scent of pumpkin spice, a soft gentle smile on my face as I sighed the nonsense of the day away, completely at peace.

When I got home, I headed for the bathroom and pulled back the shower curtain. Since I wasn’t expecting company, the tub definitely needed cleaning before I soaked naked inside of it. Looking down at the grime, I remembered the awkward truth that I barely even fit in my tub. I don’t even own bubble bath!

My entire image was a bullshit creation of who I thought I should be. I wouldn’t be a peaceful woman soaking elegantly in bubbles with a smile. I would just be an angry woman squeezed into a tub with a face full of discomfort and disappointment.

So instead, I got changed, put on my sneakers, and ran as fast as I could for as long as I could. And then the stresses of the day fell away and I felt better. That’s who I was that day. Learning who you are on any given day takes trial and error. I know I don’t want to be the angry person in the tub, so I’ll continue to practice being flexible and remembering that who I want to be might not be who I actually am at the time. Let’s all commit to meeting ourselves where we are.

Meeting ourselves where we are

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